Glad to be out of Silent Hill

So I've graduated from hell. It took forever, and yet it went by so fast. Gosh.
Anyway, I'm feeling healthier, happier, and all-around better now that I know I never have to go back there ever again. :-D

I was reading some old blog post/diary thingies on my hard drive just now, and it made me realize just how much better I'm feeling than when I was in high school.

I NOW PRESENT: a blog I wrote on myspace in 2007 and removed a day later. Probably at the end of sophomore year when I was almost failing English 10.

I REPEAT: WHAT FOLLOWS WAS WRITTEN IN 2007. IT IS NOT AN ACCURATE REPRESENTATION OF MY CURRENT FEELINGS.

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I can't deal with this. Why do I always make things harder for myself? I drag things on forever. I can't get anything done. I'm too tired. I'm too behind in everything. Why does it matter? Why do school and work and grades all matter? Where will this really get me in life? I'm trying so hard and yet I'm not trying at all. It's like I'm moving in slow motion and yet the world is zooming right on past me. It's so hard. Why is it all so hard for me? Why do I feel so sorry for myself? Why can't life just wait for one moment? What's the point in being responsible? In the end where does it really get you? People can easily do well in school and yet fail at life. Where is my life headed? Why take so much time planning? Why not go out into the world and do something? Why make decisions? I don't even know what I think half the time. I must be here for a reason and yet I fail to do anything about it. This is all so hard for me. Reflections? I've been too busy putting my life off. I keep putting it off every day, hoping it will disappear and yet wishing it would do something about itself. I'm so hopeless. This was a fairly simple assignment. Why do I always screw things up?
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Yeah, wow. I'm so glad that hell is over. Seriously, my relief is beyond words.

For those you still struggling through high school, I have this advice: Don't take it too seriously. Don't worry if you get a C in a class. Don't be an over-achiever, especially if you're a perfectionist. Don't listen to the bullshit your teachers and counselors tell you--that if you don't get good grades you'll fail at life. Failure is just a state of mind. YOU are in charge of your destiny, and you can always change. However, I DO suggest staying in school. Don't drop out. Hell is mandatory, but it doesn't have to be hell. Just remember that. I hope some of this made sense.

Also, graduate early. Or home-school and take college classes at the same time.